My Writings

When you are upset

See see see, I am here, right here you see First you turned me on Turned me like a marble From words of garble Round and round In your fingers Round and round In your head Only a first draft You said, Wait till the...

Amma, You and Us

The day after Amma left. Sometime past midnight. Knowing that in the morning we are to carry her away. Did I write this then, or a few days after, I can’t say. It seemed a whole world kept washing away in my...

Talking self (that keeps talking)

When you can’t get even a measly word of reply out of her, no matter how you try, keep this in mind. REASON: When you hear the morning sparrow chirp, Remember it is she, making vows never to talk to you. LONGING:...

Our six year-old

“Did you notice?” You said once. “How I don’t address you by name?” “Did you wonder why?” Then we smiled At each other … We then leaned Toward each other “Did you...

Why?

You said it’s a miracle we met. I said I felt the same way. I said I was looking for you. I said I want to be your friend. Then there was a crash and a burn. I am still looking for reasons. Still counting the...

To B: When you go home

It is four in the morning. Endless hours of flying, Brought me from sunshine to sunshine. Brain on autopilot. Disconnected. Still. Experiencing, The newness of the old. Opened the door. House woke up to the sound, As if...

She starts with S

HE: I am logging off, Signing off, Booting off, Turning off, Starting off, Going off, And zooming off… All these offs Just to land in your heart…sigh! SHE: You, my friend, Need to listen to my advice And get...

Are you happy now?

We were blind once. We didn’t speak once. We didn’t know once. Then. Then…? We spoke a lot, First to ourselves, Saying “Is this real?” Then to each other, In whispers. I said I am nothing...

A Better Day

On a bright day like this
With your warm smile like today’s
I saw you walk by my eyes
Stranger in me
Feeling home
Less of me
Feeling more
One of me
Feeling for
One of you

My Hum for Your Bee

Sunday morning. A vague sense of myself, And a clear vision of you. You in the kitchen, I on the speakerphone. One image. One view. Your face, your private smile. One feeling. One longing. For that you I first saw. And...

Broken begins with a B

Suddenly awake, head flooded with A painful “thud” that made me cringe in pain. Stupid alarm radio. Always does that. It began its song already, ignoring me. Sleep. It never comes to me free of images. Now...

Macrolove – N

First cold hands, then warm you Soon sheets of macrolove Enveloped me and you Like a front that’s come in “You silly,” you said “It doesn’t die,” you said And now, fat raindrops Fall...

Gypsy Magic

“I have a new shirt,” said the gypsy. She drew me closer, within reach of her pair of sure hands “White with Green accents in the collar and cuffs,” she smiled. I saw only her neck, her ear and...

How do I know I love her

Saw her today climb into a car, someone else’s
May such moments of pain bring me
A clearer understanding
Bequeath her the rest of my years
Unlived, untainted, closer to God
This is how I know I love her.

Weight Off My Heart

For tomorrow I must lose this weight off my heart Pry it out of your vise grip of silence Somebody holds the key to this living, and its not me When nanna died, I cried at the mere sight of the birds When amma died, I...

In This Thrall of Attachment

Unforgiving, this attachment to you is. My heart believes it is a place without lies. And calls out for your heart, thinking foolishly, prematurely, and without any proof that some look, some smile, some touch from you...

Would be nice

It would be nice To touch those hands To press those fingers To take them in my hands To take them in my fingers To kiss them Feel the damp sweat of her palms on my face Would be nice To put my arm around her shoulders...

Telling amma about her

Amma, today I talked to someone Whom you would approve To lay me in my grave. Driving home, I said to you: Have you heard, have you heard? The sound of her heart beat filled to the brim with kindness that doesn’t...

Coffee walkie talkie

Every time she looked at him, she saw a new stranger. Every time he looked at her, he saw a new friend. Polite she: “Sure!” Skeptical he: “What did she mean by that?” Uncertainty strings...

Abracadabra

“So what made you approach me?” I gulped back my leaping heart at her question. In that microsecond All the reasons I was going to simplify Became complicated. Oh, I don’t know. The sharp look in her...

Saaranga English

After an intense 2-month work including a complete front-end overhaul, Saaranga Magazine is now relaunched, with a new English section. Magazine here, and my article, How will they receive me, for the inaugural edition.

Women in Love

Some women got together and came up to me as I lay on the ground. In our days we caged our hearts in each other, Now one said, “What a strange man he was,” and nodded some others. Spiteful ones, they turned...

My Man’s Cycle

In May I began my man’s cycle Fell into a world Where everything was you and everything was in you My clarity of purpose was sharp My respect for your power was firm My patience for your love was eternal Now...

This is death. Don’t Waste it.

Why talk of the unknowability of death? Nonsense. Let me tell you what death is. She will never think of you. Not out of spite, Nor because she doesn’t want to. While your body is cremated You let your heart burn...

Chairs Sat in a Line

And so, Chairs sat in a line that went around Into another line and came back around With us in them, in the conference room. I sideways to you, but half my heart, (Was it left ventricle, or the right one?) Already...

Only That

When it comes to a woman
You are only what she accords you
Framed in her silence,
Only that.
And if you are offended by this
Then you are not madly in crush with her
Fix this first.

p80 “Oliver Twist”

He wandered over them again. He had called them into view, and it was not easy to replace the shroud that had so long concealed them. There were the faces of friends and foes, and of many that had been almost strangers...

On the Shores of My Grave

A wave of somethings appeared out of nowhere Thoughts, recollections and some debris Some, questioning if my memory is true Others, smiling with kindness at me— but still unhappy at my worries That I didn’t create...

These Cuts

Just a few moments ago, Hearing a sudden eruption of noise I stopped washing my face, Hit the tap on its head And stood listening. Crows. Making ruckus, Bringing me back my cuts. Each black flight a cut From you, you...

Translation: Ismail’s “Suicide”

Plucking out and throwing away The world stinging her as thorn, This girl walked swiftly away somewhere. Translation of Ismail’s Telugu poem, original below. ఆత్మహత్య తనని బాధిస్తున్న ప్రపంచపు ముల్లుని పీకి పారేసి...

Afterlife

Yesterday I realized From the white-knuckle silence She wouldn’t let go That I am still unborn A point of no focus Not ready yet For her words that ring love May never be ready yet For that chuckle from her eyes...

How We Die

Do I not see in your face The growing pointlessness of me? Did I not get used to you Not even trying to ignore me? What then is this longing still, For a feeling for home, For an uplifting of moods? I must announce this...

Lust Never Sleeps

Lust never sleeps, It dreams of you Your face in my head Questioning me, confronting me With those big conquering eyes Prodding me to be straight And honorable, to you, to you alone Squeezing the last breath out of me...

Pedantic Poem

Here I am thinking, You were nicer to me When you were pregnant Now all you do is Give me a frown, An abrupt look away So I urge you, Become pregnant again, And walk in through the hallway On a bright sunny morning So...

Strip, Strip Everything, Strip

Strip, strip strip strip Strip everything strip That look from the corner of your eye, strip That raising your eyebrow in a tease, strip Strip that microsecond look of longing at me, strip Strip that touching my...